Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize