I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
