She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
