Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
