I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Vodka?
Forever.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
