I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
