I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
