absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Boobs speak an international language.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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