I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Randomize
