This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
