yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
