I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Randomize
