One girl and one boy is just not enough.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
