I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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