Just cropdusted the office
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
