A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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