By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
