i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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