I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
