i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
