You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
