I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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