Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
