My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize