yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
