Its about making memories worth repressing
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
