eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
