I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
