would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
You had me at "let me see your balls"
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
