Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
