There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
