It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Farmville is her only friend.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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