yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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