ADVERTISEMENT

• (810): View more from Michigan

  I can only date guys with blackberrys

  (810): View more from Michigan

  I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me

  Fav 11 985 1226

  share tweet
  

• (808): View more from Hawaii

  doesn't he have a GF?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  that just means you have to try harder.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...

  Fav 5 1425 794

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (907): View more from Alaska

  my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up

  Fav 4 3512 675

  share tweet
  

• (250): View more from British Columbia

  Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?

  Fav 41 1202 3671

  share tweet
  

• (952): View more from Minnesota

  You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.

  Fav 6 3848 951

  share tweet
  

• (614): View more from Ohio

  He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick

  Fav 19 1335 4537

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (702): View more from Nevada

  no you cant smoke seaweed

  Fav 40 5856 1699

  share tweet
  

• (904): View more from Florida

  I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.

  Fav 15 2643 1311

  share tweet
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?

  Fav 3 1703 1364

  share tweet
  

• (850): View more from Florida

  I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.

  Fav 11 2212 1028

  share tweet
  

• (850): View more from Florida

  Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.

  Fav 3 827 1719

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  IT'S SUMMA TIME

  (907): View more from Alaska

  ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  THEY'RE THE SAME THING

  Fav 2 1594 885

  share tweet
  

• (941): View more from Florida

  you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins

  Fav 0 548 373

  share tweet
  

• (301): View more from Maryland

  I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"

  Fav 3 10 46

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (206): View more from Washington

  SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG

  Fav 0 7 38

  share tweet
  

Randomize