didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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