is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
