I want you more than these girls want KFC
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
