if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
it's not cheating when I paid for it
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
