Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
