Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
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