Well apparently he's into motor boating.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
