oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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