I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
