people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize
