I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
