Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
He shit in the fireplace
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
