they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize