just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
