I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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