i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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